Living in Paris – for or against?

Paris, my one and only love. It fills such a part of my heart. I can't deny that sometimes malicious thoughts have crossed my mind, that maybe... maybe I could stay there and that's it. The croissants don't give me any rest, well! So, for the best, I've laid out for you the pros and cons of living in Paris.

for:

– I am in favor of living in Paris, because the French live the good life in the fullest sense of the word. Not as a cliché. Not out of effort. Simply because that's how they do it, and that's enough.

– because Paris Beautiful to the point of intoxicating the senses. Its streets are a delight to the eye.

– The lights are beautiful to me. The shops are beautiful to me. The cafes are beautiful to me. And especially beautiful to me from the back window of the rental car. I found that the tiny back window of the car framed Paris for me in beautiful little pictures.

– It’s beautiful to me. It smells like pleasure to me. And the mornings in Paris are a combination of rain croissant And coffee. Now! Now give me a better example than this of the best smell in the universe in the morning. Don't you have one?? Because there isn't one!!

– I am in favor of Paris because in Paris everyone is dressed - tip-top. There are no slouches. And especially - everyone is thin, especially frustratingly thin. And there is no correlation between the amount of butter - chocolate - sugar - corruption and the size of the buttocks that originate in France.

– Correct me if I'm wrong – but to me it seems like a blatant injustice. Because Paris is overly delicious.Cheeses. The wines. The pastries…. Oh my, the pastries!!! And the depraved desserts! This is too much!! It hurts, it really hurts physically, as I remember the smell of the last patisserie I visited. And maybe, just maybe, if I move to Paris, my body will also react to this equation like the French?? I also want to eat like this every day all day and be left with only one ass at the end of the day!!

– Paris, because I have a hot grandma in Paris. And that makes Paris even more than it already is. And that means a free lesson in the art of flirting. And yes, a rare lesson in archaeological excavations…. Stay healthy. She can dig and find oil even on the streets of Paris.

– Because in Paris, there is much more winter than summer. In Paris, there are autumn coats, and there is really a point in buying them.

– Because the French are so polite (especially to other French speakers). And that they don’t have barbecues in their parks, because it’s not polite for everyone to have to smell what you’re eating and choke on the smoke. And that you can step on them and they’ll apologize. Once in the market I stepped on a lady… I didn’t feel good anymore because she apologized. I told her it was okay and asked if she wanted to do it again.

– In Paris, they sell hot chestnuts and can be found all over the city from the first day of winter.

– Because the French love horse culture, are willing to invest, and are strict about horse routines. They travel in public parks (at least those in the groves near Paris) with horses. There is polo in Paris. And those who enjoy this hobby are often also a real advertisement for a healthy lifestyle.

– Yes, because in Paris it is possible and even desirable to drive like a savage. Because who needs lanes if you can turn wherever you want, whenever you want, all within the speed limit, of course.

– Because in Paris there is graffiti everywhere!!!! And all the gibberish is fine.

Yes because I want to. Yes because I can!! (Citizenship French... Nana Banana...).

Now, we should move on.
Mmmmm….
Yes. Good.
I'm against it. Because in our country, it's allowed and sometimes even advisable to eat with your hands, and in Paris, if someone saw how I was eating, they would slap me on the hands with a ruler and pull my nose with a raised angle at the end.

I weighed all the pros and cons. After difficult and bitter debates, it was unanimously decided that I would stay here and not move anywhere. Bon appetit, everyone!!