Napoleon and the Women of His Life – or: Cherchez la Femme

The video lecture on Napoleon and women

This article and the related articles are all based on Erez Levanon’s lectures “Napoleon and Women.” You can watch the entire lecture here:

Cherchez la Femme (“Look for the woman”) – this expression was coined by the writer Alexandre Dumas the Elder in his book “The Mohicans of Paris” (1864). Since then, the expression has been used whenever one wants to imply that a woman, although it is not visible, is behind a certain action of a man. Was this expression also true of Napoleon?

One of the greatest Napoleonic scholars, Frederique Masson, lists twenty-one women who were involved in Napoleon's private life, with whom he had intimate relationships. Which of them, if any, was the woman of his life?

You will discover the answers to these questions at the end of the journey – a journey to which I will take you immediately – a journey in the footsteps and into the heart of Napoleon?

Napoleon, as strange as it may sound, was a sensitive and emotional man, but despite this he knew how to make a clear distinction between his love life and his political life. Napoleon, although he was a man of progressive views compared to his contemporaries, in his attitude towards women remained the same Corsican, a man of the south, who believed that their role was to support their husbands and produce as many children as possible.

Madame de Stael

The story of Mme de Staël and Napoleon is well known. Madame de Staël was a gifted woman, a talented writer, one of the most prominent intellectual women of her time, a thinker, a discerning, independent woman. Today we would call her a feminist.

She tried to get close to Napoleon in order to captivate him with her charms. On one occasion, she approached him and asked him: “Who is the ideal woman in the opinion of the Consul?”, expecting him to point to her as an example of this woman. Napoleon, who was averse to intellectual women, cast a sideways glance at her large breasts and said: “Madame, a woman who brings up as many children as possible,” knowing that family and children were ultimately Madame de Stael’s concerns.

It is no wonder that Madame de Staël would quickly become a fierce opponent of Napoleon. And Napoleon? Napoleon would be exiled from France.

Letizia Ramolino – Napoleon's mother

Napoleon's attitude towards women is surprising considering that the dominant figure in his life was a woman – his mother, Letizia Bonaparte née Remolino, who during the Empire was called "Madame Mar." A simple, uneducated, deeply religious woman steeped in superstition, she was widowed at the age of thirty-five when Napoleon was fourteen and was left to care for six small children besides Napoleon and his fifteen-year-old older brother Joseph.

She led her family with a strong hand, and fought like a beast, during the difficult times, when the family was pursued to the neck by the Paoli people and was forced to flee Corsica by the skin of their teeth after the family home was set on fire and their property was looted. Napoleon would later tell her: “Mother, if you die, I will remain the most important person in the world.”

She watched her son's meteoric rise with some concern, and used to mutter in a pronounced Corsican accent: "Pourvou ca dur" (I hope it lasts) while saving for a rainy day, and she knew what she was doing.

When Napoleon is exiled to the island of Elba she joins him, and when he plans to return to France he seeks her advice, and she tells him: “Go, my son, follow your destiny, and if you are destined to die, it is better that you die in your own way.” A fitting answer for a Spartan mother. Madame Marr died in Rome in 1836 at the age of eighty-six, fifteen years after Napoleon’s death.

Napoleon's first love

Nowadays it is common to psychologize everything in life, especially the relationships between parents and their children. However, I am not a psychologist and will not pretend to touch on this subject, and I will content myself with the story of Napoleon's love life, and each of you will draw your own conclusions.
Napoleon's first love, which occurred when he was seventeen, was entirely platonic.

When Napoleon graduates from officer school in Paris, he is posted to serve in a town called Vallence in the south. FranceA respectable woman from a noble family, Gregoire du Colombier, admires the young man and foresees great things for him. She introduces him to her daughter Charlotte Pierrette Anne Caroline, who was probably good-looking, although this is not fully reflected in the few portraits I have been able to locate, but who probably had beautiful legs and delicate hands, as Napoleon had a particular weakness for these organs, and they would be a condition that he would not pass in any romantic relationship he might have in the future.

Napoleon smilingly brings up this connection in his memoirs:

“I remember well that summer morning, just as the sun was rising. It’s hard to believe that the great happiness I felt at that moment was expressed in us eating cherries together.”

However, the relationship would come to an end when Napoleon moved with his regiment to a town called Auxonne, and Caroline? Caroline would marry an officer older than her, named Bressieux. Napoleon continued to correspond with her and upon becoming emperor, he would promote Caroline's brother to a prominent position and choose her to serve as one of the bridesmaids in the entourage of his mother, Madame Mar.

He will influence her and her relatives for good, but she refuses to accept, saying that the good memories of that time in Valence are enough for her. Napoleon does not give up and gives her an exquisite ring made by a craftsman - a ring that will remain in the family for nearly two hundred years, until a few years ago it was sold by one of Caroline's descendants for $38,500.

What did Napoleon think about love?

In Auxonne, Napoleon and his schoolmate and military comrade, Alexandre de Mazy, used to argue, after dinner at a restaurant owned by a man named Dumont, on various subjects which they also wrote down. One of the arguments revolved around Alexander's passion for the beautiful Adelaide (La belle Adelaide).

Napoleon will write an essay following this debate entitled: “Dialogue sur l'Amour” (Dialogue on Love): “I was in love before,” he writes.

And the memories of my love are enough to free me from the need for those metaphysical definitions whose function is only to complicate. Love, I insist, does not exist. In my opinion, love damages society and the individual happiness of human beings. In short, love is more harmful to man than it is useful, and it would be a grace from heaven to uproot it and free the world from its shackles.

This brazen attack on love is puzzling, as there is no known prior romantic relationship that could have caused the young Napoleon heartbreak. Napoleon may have adopted the style of his spiritual “mentor,” Jean-Jacques Rousseau, who wrote in his book “The New Heloise” that “love of society and country must be placed before love of women”—a statement that Jean-Jacques Rousseau himself violated in his famous sexual promiscuity.

It is possible that this article was written against the backdrop of a trauma that Napoleon experienced several months earlier, in November 1787, when he was in Paris to settle a certain family matter with the authorities. One evening during that visit, he met a prostitute inPalais-Royal And takes her to his hotel room.

We do not know what happened in the hotel room that night, but it is known that upon becoming Consul, Napoleon ordered all prostitutes to be expelled from the Palais-Royal and banned prostitution in Paris - a decree that the Parisians, of course, could not abide.

Desiree Clary, the lover who became Queen of Sweden

However, Napoleon's love life takes a turn after his star rises in the sky of Toulon. Napoleon proves himself to be a brilliant artillery officer in the campaign to capture the city of Toulon, and is promoted to the rank of General of Brigade.

A few weeks later, the two Bonaparte brothers, Joseph, the eldest, and his brother Napoleon, form a romantic relationship with two sisters, Julie and Desiree Clary. The Clary family is one of the wealthiest families in Marseille – and this appeals to the two Delfini brothers, especially since they are good-looking girls.

Joseph falls in love with the young Désirée, but Napoleon covets her for himself and he convinces his brother to stick with Julie by saying: You and Désirée are neither strong-willed nor decisive, while Julie and I are strong and decisive, so it is better that you marry Julie, and I marry Désirée.

And so it was, but only half the time. Joseph married Julie – while the relationship between Napoleon and Désirée gradually weakened after Napoleon received a summons to report to Paris for a new military assignment. As Napoleon moved away from Marseille and closer to Paris, his letters to Désirée grew colder.

Some say that the reason for the severance of ties was the initiative of the Clary family, who said that one Corsican Delfone was enough for a family that could offer each of its daughters a dowry of one hundred thousand francs.

And Desiree, the disappointed Desiree? She will marry the general. Bernadotte, whom Napoleon would later appoint as Marshal, despite the complicated relationship between them, since Bernadotte was initially an ardent republican and vigorously opposed the Treaty of Brumaire - which brought Napoleon to power.

The Swedes would later offer Bernadotte the throne of their country, after their king, Charles XIII, ceased to function. Bernadotte would become King of Sweden, Charles XIV, and Désirée? Désirée would become Queen of Sweden, although she would prefer to spend most of her time in vibrant Paris over freezing Stockholm. She also did not learn to speak Swedish until the end of her life.

You have all surely heard of one of her descendants, Count Polka Bernadotte, who came to our country, the Land of Israel, in the midst of the War of Independence, in September 1948 as a United Nations envoy and ended his life on the corner of the Jewish Battalion and Palmach streets in Jerusalem by a squad of Lehi men led by Yehoshua Cohen, who assassinated him.

The love story of Napoleon and Désirée was a minor episode among Napoleon's loves. However, ever since the Austrian author Anne-Marie Slinko published the famous novel "Désirée" and ever since Hollywood released the film Désirée starring Marlon Brando as Napoleon and the beautiful Jean Simmons as Désirée, my mother and many of her generation believed that Désirée was Napoleon's greatest love.

Josephine de Beauharnais

Napoleon arrives in Paris and is struck by astonishment. A few months earlier, Robespierre had been beheaded and with him the Reign of Terror was cut short. The bourgeoisie takes control of the revolution. The atmosphere of terror is replaced by hedonism and debauchery, which are triumphantly won over by the social salons dominated by women. Napoleon quickly grasps the situation and writes to his brother Joseph:

The place is filled with all the things that can distract the mind and make life pleasant. No one is given time to think... Women are everywhere - applauding at plays, reading in bookstores, strolling in the garden. The cute creatures even penetrate the professor's study.

Paris It is the only place in the world where they are fit to hold the helm of the state. Men's minds are consumed by them; they think of nothing but them, they live only by them and for them. Give a woman six months in Paris and she will know where her kingdom is and what is due to her.

The ambitious young officer of twenty-five understands that the path to career success lies through the social salons. But which woman from the salons would show interest in the gaunt and stern officer, whose long black hair, which hung from both sides of his head to his shoulders, earned him the nickname “the man with the spaniel ears,” and whose serious, penetrating gaze only added to this daunting appearance.

However, the goddess of fortune who smiled on Napoleon in the sky of Toulon will also shine upon him in the sky of Paris. The Directory, the body that ruled France at the time, is looking for a soldier to protect him from the mob that is about to storm his seat in the Tuileries Palace. Napoleon accepts the challenge.

He surrounds the palace with cannons. Kills dozens if not hundreds of the crowd. Saves the Directory, is promoted to the rank of General of Division, and meets a woman named Anne Marie Joseph Tascher de la Pagerie, whom he will call Josephine for short. Josephine will be the lucky charm of his life.

You can read about the love story of Napoleon and Josephine in the article Josephine de Boernais and Napoleon: A love story of fire and brimstone.

Napoleon's Unknown Mistresses

As you will see in the article about Josephine, she did not bother to remain faithful to him and very quickly found other lovers, which led Napoleon in turn to seek mistresses for him. With the exception of Maria and Levski, whom we will discuss later, these are not usually “mythical” lovers known to the general public and most of them remained unknown to the majority of history buffs.

If you would like to read about them, you are welcome to visit the following articles:

• Marguerite Polin-Belize – The Woman Who Almost Took Napoleon from Josephine
• The women who walked through the secret corridor in the Tuileries Palace

Maria Walewska

As mentioned, if there is one "mythological lover" of Napoleon, it is Maria Lebowska, whom Napoleon first met in 1807. This love story would last for about 10 years until Maria's death and would ultimately result in Napoleon's divorce from Josephine.

Since Maria and Labeska deserve a separate article, you are welcome to visitMaria Walewski – “Queen Esther of Poland”  And read how she “sacrificed herself” for the sake of the homeland.

Maria Luisa of Austria – Napoleon's second wife

In 1809, Napoleon was at the height of his political power. Although the seeds of disaster had already been planted in Spanish soil, their sprouts were still not visible. Now he decided to divorce Josephine. Napoleon was a brave man – on the battlefield, in politics, but in the face of Josephine he was struck with a heartache.

After failing to convince others to convey the message to her, he is forced to confront her himself. She faints. He sheds a tear, but after she comes to her senses she realizes that the decision cannot be reversed. He will give her anything she asks for. The palace in Malmaison, a hunting lodge in Navarre, an allowance of three million francs a year, and he will leave her the title of Empress. He will also continue to be interested in her and care for her even after the divorce.

Then, then the blood of the House of Bonaparte will mix with the blood of the House of Habsburg – the oldest royal house in Europe. Napoleon married Marie Louise, daughter of the Austrian Emperor, Francis II. This is a political marriage. It was made by proxy. Napoleon did not see the bride before the marriage, only her picture.

However, he was mainly interested in her motherhood and was only reassured after he learned that her great-grandmother, Empress Maria Theresa, had given birth to twenty-seven children, and that her grandmother, Maria Carolina, was her sister. Marie Antoinette, the wife of King Louis XVI, who was also beheaded on the guillotine, had seventeen children. Her mother, Maria Theresa of Naples and Sicily, had only thirteen children, because she died during the thirteenth childbirth, which was complicated.

Marie Louise was a typical Habsburg. Long, straight blond hair, high forehead, light blue eyes (China Blue), wide chin, sparkling white teeth, face dotted with smallpox marks, broad white shoulders, full body, long, narrow arms with delicate, beautiful hands and beautiful feet.

Marie Louise was without a will of her own. Like a robot, a puppet on a string operated by her father. She learned and spoke seven European languages, including Latin, because it was known from her childhood that she would marry into one of the royal houses of Europe, although it was not known which one.

In the palace where she grew up, everything that could hint at the existence of sexual desire was hidden from her. Instead of brides, there were roosters. The books she read were carefully censored, and a companion was kept close to her to prevent her from having any contact with members of the opposite sex. All she knew about Napoleon was that he was a monster, who had caused her family and her to flee Vienna four times. However, when her father ordered her to marry Napoleon, she obeyed without a word, and even with some indifference, for that was what she had been brought up to do.

Napoleon was supposed to receive her in a town called Compiègne, on the French border, but being, as usual, impatient, he galloped towards her on his horse all night in the pouring rain, then got into her carriage, dripping with water, and began to hug and kiss her, as she muttered the phrases he had taught her to say. And he, he would quiet down and say: “There is no need.”

They would spend the night in a pavilion, which had been built especially for them. This was against the norm, as the religious ceremony had not yet taken place. Napoleon would excuse himself by saying: “King Henry IV did it too.” In the morning he would say to his friend:

My friend got married in Germany. These are the best women in the world. Kind, friendly, innocent and fresh as a rose.

And Marie Louise, she would wake up with sparkling eyes. She had discovered a new world, which she absolutely loved, and she wanted more and more of it. Three months later she would say to Metternich, who was the Austrian ambassador in Paris:

I'm not afraid of Napoleon anymore. I think he loves me.

And he did love her. On March 20, 1811, she goes into labor, but the birth is complicated. The doctor comes out in a panic and tells Napoleon that he must choose between the mother and the baby. Napoleon immediately says: “The mother” but adds: “Give birth to her as you give birth to a woman from the Saint-Denis district.”

The doctor will recover and return to the room and the birth will be successful. A child will be born who is more Habsburg than Bonaparte. Blond with light blue eyes. Napoleon II. In the apple of Napoleon's eye. Napoleon will crown him in his cradle with the title: "King of Rome" (Roi de Rome).

In early 1814, Napoleon leaves Paris on his way to repel France's enemies who have invaded its territory. He kisses Marie Louise and her three-year-old son. He does not know that he will never see them again. Napoleon will be defeated. He will be exiled to the island of Elba. Marie Louise will break off relations with him at her father's behest and find solace in the arms of an innocent Austrian army officer, Adam Albert von Knipberg, with whom she will have four children, two of whom will be born while she is still married to Napoleon.

Maria Wolveskaya, on the other hand, will come to visit Napoleon on the island of Elba, along with their four-year-old son Alexander.

and Roi de Rome, he would grow up in the Schönbrunn Palace in Vienna as an Austrian prince, but unfortunately would die in 1832 from pneumonia at the age of twenty-one.

A sad end to the story of Napoleon's loves, which we touched on in passing. And the question arises: Who was the woman of his life?
Desiree, Josephine, Pauline, Georgina, Garcini, Danuel, Maria Walewska, Marie Louise?

Of all the women, the real dilemma is between two: Josephine and Maria Wołowska. Napoleon loved both of them, each at a different time. But which one was the woman of his life?

Napoleon himself will answer this question. While on St. Helen he will say:

I loved Marie Louise very much, but the love of my life was Josephine.

And on May 5, 1821, as he lay on his deathbed in Saint-Hélène, and before he breathed his last, Napoleon uttered four words: France, 'Arme'e (the army), Tete d'Armme (the head of the army), Josephine!!

Twenty-six years after Napoleon left a note at Josephine's bedside: "I awaken and my whole being fills you," he closes his eyes as his whole being fills her.

Some say that Napoleon's biggest mistake was his invasion of Russia, but if you ask me, the biggest mistake of his life was his divorce from Josephine, as she was the lucky charm of his life.

And as we said: Cherchez la Femme. Look for the woman!